Underneath It All Read online

“That bad, huh?”

  “Nothing romantic about this couple’s four weddings. Basically, they’re two crazies who’ve turned breaking up into an art form.” Pulling her notes from the pad and tucking them into the folder, she admitted they weren’t a story as much as they were simply two people who couldn’t make up their minds about what they wanted from life. Nicole had been hoping for something more romantic, maybe two soul mates that the world kept tearing apart, but that wasn’t the case. They were just a couple who refused to resolve their problems. When things got tough, they found it easier to hit divorce court than attack the real issues.

  Funny, how easily she could analyze everyone but herself.

  “So if they’re bust what else have we got?” Eve asked.

  Stuffing the folder in her file cabinet, Nicole moved to the pair of background checks that had been delivered that morning.

  “I’ve got what the P. I did for Rate Your Mate Before It’s Too Late.”

  Eve’s eyes brightened. “The background research you ordered on you and Devon?”

  Nicole nodded but didn’t share Eve’s excitement. Instead, she tried to brush off her visit from Devon and the nagging feeling it left in her gut.

  “So anything juicy in them?”

  “I haven’t looked,” she said.

  Eve stared at her with surprise. “Why not?”

  “I’m just not sure this is any of our business.”

  “I don’t get it, what’s with the big change of pace? Last time we talked, you were set on the idea people had a right to know what their lover might not be telling them.”

  And up until a moment ago, Nicole wouldn’t have thought twice about looking through Devon’s file. But now she wasn’t so sure.

  Because I happen to believe in such a thing as trust.

  Devon’s words came back to her, boring a hole in the new attitude she’d formed during the last year. She’d believed in trust too, once, and in her hurt and anger she’d shoved it aside thinking trust was for fools.

  But who was the fool, really?

  Too many times lately suspicion and doubt had stopped her from getting what she wanted. It had paralyzed her and left her motionless when she should have moved forward. Though she felt people had a right to the truth, she didn’t know if this method was the answer. In fact, the longer she considered it, the less confident she felt about everything, and Devon’s words hadn’t helped.

  Was it true? Was she so damaged that her future was relegated to background checks and investigations in order to trust in the people she loved?

  “Oh, I don’t know,” she said with a sigh, more confused now than she’d been ten minutes ago. “When I started this segment, it had all seemed simple. There was truth and there were lies. But the farther I get into it, the more I’m realizing the importance of faith.” She eyed Eve. “Where does that fit in?”

  “It’s a point I think we should explore, for sure.”

  Nicole grabbed both files and shoved them in her desk. “I’m thinking the whole angle of the show needs to be reworked.” Pushing up from her chair she began pacing her office. “That woman, Nancy Shepard, the one who got scammed for thirty thousand dollars, do you think background checks are the answer to her problems?”

  “No, what she could use is her thirty grand back.”

  Nicole frowned. “I’m serious. This segment has been completely focused on people protecting themselves from getting burned, particularly people who’ve been there before, but the more I think about it, the more I just don’t know anymore.”

  “What else is there?”

  “Healing.”

  “Healing?” Eve asked.

  “Files like this,” she said, gesturing toward the drawer. “Do they solve problems or avoid them? Maybe instead of reacting to betrayal by not trusting the people we meet, we should be trying to heal the pain instead.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with that.” Eve tapped a finger to her lips. “In fact, I like that a lot. It’s way more positive. It digs into the deeper issues.”

  “The problem is how do you heal?”

  Eve shrugged. “Why don’t we call Dr. Lennox?”

  Dr. Lennox was a therapist they brought onto the show when they felt the need for an expert opinion, but Nicole wasn’t satisfied with getting a therapist’s opinion and leaving it at that. She’d seen two of them back in California and neither had gone far in the way of helping her sort out her problems. At the time, they’d simply become another voice in her ear telling her how she was supposed to feel or that the feelings she had were normal.

  That wasn’t what she’d wanted to hear. That she had a right to be mad and confused didn’t help her figure out how to move on with her life. It just kept her mad and confused.

  Though she wasn’t opposed to Dr. Lennox, she wanted more.

  “I’m thinking of that woman,” she said, moving back to her desk and pulling out the file. “Sylvia Grey. Her husband had been married to another woman for the entire ten years of their marriage and she never knew about it. They even had a child. Yet three years after putting him in jail for bigamy, she remarried.”

  “What did she have to say about it?”

  Nicole glanced over the notes, rereading the interview. Sylvia was one of the first women she’d met with and Nicole remembered being skeptical, but she couldn’t remember why. Scanning the notes, she came upon the issue. “I’d asked her how she learned to trust again and she said you just do it. That there isn’t a choice.”

  Nicole remembered thinking that was too simplistic, that the audience wouldn’t accept that. She knew she hadn’t.

  Moving farther down the page, she saw another note she’d forgotten. “She said it was about finding the right people to support her and accepting their help. She said there wasn’t a miracle cure. It simply took time and patience and understanding.”

  Lowering to her chair, Nicole let the comment hang in the air between them. She remembered Sylvia more clearly, reading over those notes. She hadn’t wanted to hear what the woman had to say. It had sounded passive, like a time heals all wounds cliché. And she’d dismissed the new husband’s part in it all, how much his patience and understanding helped Sylvia get through her problems. And though Nicole still wasn’t sure this would make a good show, she was feeling better about this angle than the idea of hiring private eyes to check out lovers.

  Now that she thought about it, that wasn’t the answer at all. Devon was right—that type of thinking only furthered the paranoia, adding fuel to the notion that people couldn’t be trusted, and avoiding the issue of healing altogether.

  “This needs to be a show about renewing faith, not protecting ourselves against creeps.”

  “Why am I getting the impression we’re talking about more than the show?”

  Nicole shrugged. “I’ve been there, you know that. And I’m beginning to think a good offense isn’t always the best defense.” Shuffling the pages back in order, she placed them in the folder. “So we’ve got a new angle with the segment?”

  Eve nodded. “I like it. Like I said, it’s more positive. Let’s go with it.” She gave Nicole the thumbs up and left her office. Nicole pulled open the desk drawer with the background checks, this time with the intent of taking them both to the shredder. But before she did, she went ahead and opened hers, looking through the information and seeing nothing untoward. There were the parking tickets she’d accumulated when her friend Reyna moved to the house on Geary. That was a pain in the ass, and though she missed Reyna, she didn’t miss the old parking situation.

  Nicole’s credit score was better than she’d expected, bringing a smile to her face. Several pages had her birth date, but didn’t reference her adoption, and as she thumbed through the papers, she was pleased to see no other surprises to greet her.

  It was a good thing. One shock in a lifetime was enough, thank you.

  Closing the file she glanced at Devon’s and wondered what he’d seen. He’d been angry she’d ordered thi
s file, and when all was said and done, she couldn’t really blame him. That hadn’t been the right approach to dealing with her problems, and she intended to take a new direction starting now.

  Picking up Devon’s file, she carried it to the shredder, shoving the pages through without glancing at a solitary tidbit. It was time to move forward and explore all those issues she and Devon had discussed when they’d talked at the ballpark. She would weigh the pros and cons of searching down her birth parents, and even if she had to chart out every scenario on a big white board, that’s what she’d do. But one thing was for sure, living another day in limbo would no longer be an option.

  12

  “EXPLAIN THIS.” Devon slapped the loan papers on Todd’s desk and waited for a reaction. On his way back from the station, he’d made a few stops gathering up paperwork on these accounts that had shown up under his name. The effort had confirmed his suspicions; his little brother had been falsifying loan applications and walking away with tens of thousands in Devon’s name.

  And he wanted to know why.

  The look on Todd’s face said he wasn’t prepared for this, which only fueled Devon’s anger. Did Todd actually think he’d never get caught? Had he assumed Devon was so witless he wouldn’t notice credit of this magnitude being issued under his name?

  “Oh, man, I was going to tell you about that.”

  “Yeah? And what were you going to say?”

  “Look, I’d just tapped out all my resources and didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

  “You couldn’t have asked me for the money?”

  Todd’s trapped expression turned to surprise. “Would you have given it to me?”

  “You never gave me that option, did you?” He stepped away from the desk and began pacing the office, feeling the need to put some distance between him and his brother before he succumbed to the impulse to grab the man by the throat and shake out why he’d done this.

  “How could you have tapped out all your resources?” Devon asked. “What kind of financial shape are you in?”

  “I’m flat broke. I can’t get any more credit and I can’t borrow from any more friends. I would have asked but I couldn’t afford for you to turn me down.”

  Devon stopped pacing and stared at Todd. How could the man possibly be broke? They all made hefty salaries as executives of the firm, in addition to commission on the investments. Nobody in the family was hurting.

  “What the hell do you spend your money on?”

  Todd held up his hands and shrugged. “Things got a little out of hand. I swung a couple of bad deals, made one or two bad bets and it snowballed.”

  “You went broke gambling?”

  Todd scoffed. “You know, you’re just as hypocritical as Dad. Our whole business of investing is nothing more than gambling with people’s money. You lose here and it’s simply a bad return. I lose in Vegas and I’m suddenly some kind of idiot.”

  Devon stood for a moment, trying to grasp the situation. “Exactly how much did you lose?”

  “It doesn’t matter. Dad’s getting it under control.”

  “So dad is in on this.”

  “We’re putting all the money back. Once we fix the audit and get Bryce squared away—”

  “Bryce knows about this, too?”

  Todd looked at him as though that should have been obvious. “He hadn’t been until recently. But he is in charge of the audit. We didn’t have a choice.” Shaking his head, he added, “I never would have cut into the firm. I know better than that, but they were going to kill me.”

  “What?” Devon stepped to the conference table and dropped into one of the chairs. “How could you get yourself into such a mess and then drag Dad and Bryce into it?”

  “What was I supposed to do? I’d run out of answers. I’d tried taking out loans to pay back the company but it was too late. By then, the auditors had already clamped down on the books.”

  Devon lowered his face to his hands and sat for a moment.

  Todd had always been a gambler. Heck, their mother used to get him to eat his peas as a kid by betting him a dollar he couldn’t do it. The man flew to Vegas several times a year, spent his weekends at the track, and none of it had seemed like a cause for concern up until now. But this kind of debt, this kind of a mess was most definitely causing concern.

  “Oh, hell,” Devon said with a sigh. “How much are you in for?”

  “Nothing, now. The bookies are all paid off. We only need to cover what I borrowed from the firm.”

  “Borrowed?”

  “I’m paying every cent back. I’d just had a bad streak is all, but my luck is turning.”

  Devon looked up at his brother, aghast. “You can’t still be gambling.”

  “I told you, things got out of hand, but I’ve got everything under control.”

  “No, what you’ve got is a gambling problem.”

  Todd smirked. “Everyone gambles. But I know my limits now. And Dad’s squaring away the audit.” Frowning, he added, “You’re worrying too much about this.”

  Devon couldn’t believe his ears. His brother had nearly gotten killed, had jeopardized the family business, yet spoke as if everything was perfectly in order.

  “If you even think you can keep gambling, you need professional help.”

  “I’m all right.”

  “No. You’re not,” he said.

  “Look, I told you I was sorry. We’re putting the money back. What more do you want from me?”

  Shaking his head, Devon grabbed the paperwork and turned toward the door. “More than you’re willing to deal with,” he said, before storming out. He made his way down the hall to his father’s office, needing to get a sane perspective on this mess.

  “You okay, son?” William asked, hanging up a call as Devon walked in.

  Devon pushed the documents in front of his father. “Why didn’t you tell me about Todd?”

  William scanned the top page and looked away. “I’m taking care of that. Those accounts will be closed—”

  “I already closed them and paid off the debt.”

  “You didn’t have to do that.”

  “Neither did you, but considering what this cost me, I think I deserve to know what’s been happening.”

  William rubbed a hand over his face and Devon noticed again how tired his father seemed. He had bags under his eyes, his skin was blotched and ashen. His cheeks appeared drawn, as if he’d been doing more drinking than eating lately, and Devon cursed his brother for putting this kind of stress on the man.

  “Todd got himself into trouble,” his father said.

  “Todd’s got a gambling problem.”

  “That he does.”

  “I don’t understand why you didn’t confide in me. I’m supposed to be taking over this company.” Holding up the papers, he added, “These are my personal finances. Why didn’t you bring me in on this?”

  “It’s Todd’s matter.”

  “No, it’s a family matter, one we should be handling together.”

  William sighed and nodded consent. “I suppose you’re right. Although, this has to be kept close to the vest and I figured the fewer people who knew about it the better.”

  Lowering to a chair, Devon tried to let the admission make him feel better, but he couldn’t shake the bitterness that his father and Bryce had kept him in the dark on this. It hurt not to be trusted, no matter what the reason. They should have known they could trust him, and worse yet, they should have known he would have eventually uncovered the truth. Did everyone truly think he was that big a fool?

  “Todd’s refusing to get help, can you believe it? He doesn’t see that he’s got a problem.”

  “I’ll be keeping a rein on Todd’s access to money.”

  “He needs rehab.”

  William held up a hand. “Now, Devon, let’s not go that far. Todd got carried away, but making more out of it than necessary won’t help anyone.”

  Devon’s jaw dropped. “I can’t believe you don’t agr
ee he needs professional help. This isn’t a few thousand lost at the roulette wheel. He got himself in serious trouble and considering the denial he’s in, he’s going to end up doing it again.”

  “We can’t just dump him in rehab. We’ve got to be sensitive to the image of this company.”

  “The company?”

  “We’re in the business of handling people’s money. It’ll be tricky enough rectifying the problems with this audit, we don’t need the extra publicity of one of our executives admitting to a gambling problem.”

  “This is Todd’s life we’re talking about.”

  “And his needs have to be balanced with the needs of the company.”

  Devon leaned against the back of his chair, still not believing his ears. No wonder Todd was taking the matter so lightly. Their father intended to simply bail him out and shove the whole thing under the rug.

  “He needs help, Dad.”

  “And after everything quiets down, we’ll get him that help, but we have to take care of first things first. In the meantime, I’m tightening down on everything.”

  “Like taking away all our expense authority.”

  William looked apologetic. “I couldn’t take away Todd’s alone. It would have pointed the finger at him in the eyes of the auditors. It was easier to explain that I’d cut off everyone until we could properly back-up the transactions. When the time is right, I’ll be restoring your authority.” Smiling assuredly, he added, “Trust me. This will all work out and everything will be fine.”

  Spoken like a man talking to a four-year-old, Devon thought. His father had obviously come up with a plan of his own and intended to work things out the way he saw fit, be damned with what Devon thought or how he might want to approach the problem. If Devon hadn’t wanted out of the firm before, he most certainly wanted out now. Not only would this job never be his fully, he now realized his father didn’t even value his input or trust him with sensitive information.

  What else was going on around here that Devon didn’t know about? How many other skeletons did the family have in the closet? Given this situation, he could only imagine what else went on behind his back.